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Saturday, September 24, 2011
Broken.  Everything's been spoken, all I get is just being broken Looked up at the bright night sky while walking alone through the silent streets with my face so blue, going back home with the wind breathing through my skin. I hold on to my heavy tears, trying to be strong like heart made of steel. I tried to distract myself by looking up at stars seeing how beautiful when they twinkle, I tried to be at eased by lighting up a cigarette & smoke it til it's all done. I tried every single thing, but all I get is just the same old bloody pain. How can I pretend not to give a single damn thing about you when I've been giving you all my damn ever since? I apologies to you on that very occasion & I mean what I say. I told you that if you were to dislike what I am doing, tell me & I won't asked you again. Like I said, I won't force you cause I'm just asking... But what is it that you think that you're a slave or a bitch? I mean, asking you out with me & all, it shows that I want to spend my time with you. Whichever part is that a slave? If you don't want to, tell me.. Don't just go out with me, insincerely. I mean, what for? You yourself tell me that you'll accompany me to take my things & when I called you on that very day, you said you can't, I understand that. I told you to call me yesterday cause we need to talk, you think that I'm treating you like a bitch. Is it wrong to just call me? I mean, why are you thinking this way? You told me that I can joined you to go Club, last Thursday. I waited for your call, I was so eager cause I want to dance with you, it has been so long we've not dance together but not a single call was made from you. I messaged you but still, no response. I got pissed, it all became so blue to me on that night but eventually, I got over it. I just asked you why didn't you call me & there you go saying that I'm treating you like a slave. I'm very sorry if you think that I'm treating you like one when actually, I've never been having that mindset to treat you that way. I love you & if I could, I want to spend all my entire time with you but all I can see is that, you're a priority to me & I'm just an option in your life. I don't even know why am I being so nice & caring to the people I loved when in return, I get nothing. I just wish I don't owned a nice heart. I give up caring for you, really I do. This time, I rest my case, I'll just take all the fault, I'll just agree that I'm treating you like a slave. I just want all this to end cause I don't want you to hide yourself from me again, but this time, I won't bother you anymore. If that is what you want, I won't be a pain in your heart anymore. Yes I teared yesterday when I read your statuses, so I shall not do my part as a brother anymore. I'll leave you alone, just don't hide yourself again. A small favor from me to you. If you can't do this favor, then I got no words to say. Just don't do anything that can caused your heart to break into a zillion pieces. I love you Abang ( big brother ), always have, always will. Yesterday, I've been going through a very rough day. I just hope today will be a new day for me. Labels: Broken |
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